Common Decency – are you still out there?

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Although I don’t like the idea of anything being common (especially as we say in Afrikaans – Kommen, met ‘n ‘k’) there are three things that should be – common sense, common honesty and common decency.

Of all three, common decency is the one that I feel every human being should just inherently have – except of course sociopaths, they may be excused from this tirade. I would never expect everyone to have common sense – some people really can’t help that one. And I understand that honesty isn’t always that simple. Common decency is the one that just really gets to me. 

I drive a lot of people in my life crazy every time I lament the loss of common decency, but I can’t help myself. When I see a shopping trolley abandoned in a parking spot – keeping someone from being able to park there – I can’t help but ask, “Would it really have been SO difficult just to return the trolley to the bay?” That was made even worse when we once got back to our car to see a trolley abandoned between two parking spots – and leaning against our car! And it LEFT A SCRATCH! Really?

‘Common decency’ seems to have become a kind of oxymoron, since it isn’t all that common anymore.

But wait!

Before I scare you off – don’t stop reading yet. Now that I’ve gotten my little rant out of the way, I’m not going to moan and groan and act all high and mighty about how there are no decent people left in the world. What would that accomplish? Instead I just want to take an objective perspective of what common decency actually is.

To me – it means doing what’s expected of any normal human being.

But that’s probably too broad a definition, since some people might still qualify as ‘normal’ human beings but don’t always act that way. So we should probably add in an element of consideration for other people – that’s probably the main thing.

Common decency isn’t simply about social conventions like covering your mouth when you sneeze – it’s about giving the people around you some thought. It’s about being considerate of other people, their possible situations, feelings and what they’re doing. It’s like the very worn-out saying that you should treat others the way you want to be treated (unless of course you’re a sado-masochist or something less-ordinary like that). Basically, common decency means having empathy.

I think the nicest way to explain it is this – it all comes down to looking at the world through different lenses and trying to see and understand perspectives other than our own. All it takes it putting yourself in someone else’s position and trying to understand them – and to care about how anything you do might affect them. That’s it.

There are very few things that can brighten up my day more than having other people treat me with common decency. Doesn’t it make your day a little bit brighter when a car gives you a gap on the highway? Or someone sees you coming down the aisle with your shopping trolley and they move out of the way for you?

George Orwell, who’s often referred to as the saint of common decency, figures common decency as a humanising force – I like that idea. So if we treated each other with more decency – would the world be a more decent place?

I guess we’ll never know – and for that, I shall lament.

Bottom line - just try a little bit harder not to be a selfish douche. I'll try too. 

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